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Before anything else, we have GOT to discuss Carrie, who I love (and who, thankfully, didn't sing Jesus Take the Wheel for the millionth time). But WHY did nobody tell me that she and Nicole Richie were related?? While I won't deny that she's stunning (Ohhhhh how I miss the perfect skin of my teens and early twenties!) it's very sad that she's lost so much weight. I loved that she was a "normal" girl on the show. And even then she was still on the thin side. But now?? Bitch needs some CAKE.
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So, we've been really busy lately and haven't had time to watch the Idol shows "live". Course...even when we're here during the show we don't watch it live, because then we can't fast-forward through the crap that irritates the hell out of us. You don't really expect us to suffer through the torture that is the contestants performing different variations on the theme known as the Brady Bunch Variety Show, now do you??
Tough. NOT happening, my friend.
No.
I don't know how much more I can watch the show this year, regardless. I know I say that all the time, but I ...really don't like anyone much this year. And since Antonella McKibbin...I'm sorry, I mean BARBRA is gone, well...the train wrecks are dwindling, and since that was what kept us coming back? Not much left. And while Sanjaya is still there (only because the androgenous, "Emo" style is in right now, NOT because he can actually sing well), it still doesn't matter, because George utterly DETESTS him, so...again...not so much.
I don't know if it's that they don't have anyone with great talent as in previous years, or if it's that they've done a bad job "developing the characters" this year, but...I don't care about or like a single one of the contestants.
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That said, let's get on with my comments thus far. May be a bit late in the game to post these now, but I went to the trouble of typing 'em up, so...why waste?? I only wrote comments on the guys' show from earlier this week. The women, as everyone knows, are so much more talented. And the only thing I can recall is that I was pleasantly surprised to hear (Gina?) sing an Evanescence song. I didn't think anyone could replicate that voice and sound, much less an Idol contestant. She really surprised me.
Okay, on to the guys:
That dork-ass beat-boxer? Dear GOD. His pre-performance-comments made me cringe to the point of pain. He was dressed up in some odd character clothing and said some idiotic things and then they showed him in his regular clothes and he said: "You just met Jimmy Walker Blue! That's just one of the characters I do! ....What can I say, I like to have fun!!"
um...no. NO. You = stoopit. You go NOW Joe! GO!
Brandon Rogers Gross. This guy should get booted for his utter lack of courtesy and simple hygiene alone. Each time this jackass sings, he can't manage to do so without smearing his mouth all over the mic the entire time. Seriously...the WHOLE time. I would lose my shit if I had to perform after that. Is the concept of GERMS lost on these people?? *Disgusted--and Monk-like--shudder...times THREE*
(four, five, six)
LEAVE ME ALONE!!!
Bald Guy Whose Name I Forgot to Write Down: Ohhhh no. He is NOT singing a Leann Rhymes song. Oh ouch...he's YELLING it, too. It's an especially bad choice for him considering the fact that she completely TRASHED a former idol winner (Carrie Underwood) for winning a grammy (during the whole poor-sport Faith Hill debacle) because apparently Carrie Underwood hasn't paid the requisite "dues" to be this successful. As though that freakin' MATTERS and like anyone with any grace or intelligence or decency would begrudge ANYONE, especially someone with immense talent, success, instant or otherwise. And as though Leann went through such hardship, being a kajillionaire at the tender age of TWELVE. Complete BITCH. I used to love Leann and positively detest her now. I had no idea what an ungracious brat she really is. And I suppose the fact that she charges her fans nearly $30.00 just to peek at her blog should have been a clue. Who would PAY for that drivel??
Ugh...Gracie Tangent...sorry. Back to the comments:
Anyway, it must have driven Ms. Rhymes absolutely inSANE that her song was used for a competition she clearly hates. That part pleased me very much.
Curly Hair Chris - Gracie: "I think he has the best voice on the show." George qualifier: "For the MEN. The women are MUCH better." His humor's pretty good, too. The lisp is a little distracting, but he likely can't help that. And if you don't actually watch him when he sings? If you look away and pretend it's the radio or a CD? It's easier to miss the lisp.
Heaven Spice (er...Sundance, er...whatever) is trying WAY too hard to mack on Curly Chris' sense of humor. And is failing miserably. (Update: clearly I wasn't the only one baffled by his copycat ways and hideous chin pubes, cause he's GONE now.)
Ohhhh, what a surprise. Randy sucked air through his teeth EVERY SINGLE TIME he felt the need to dole out criticism and disdain for a performance. I'm just. so. SURPRISED.
Wow. Antonella is even MORE retarded than I thought. Simon was incredibly gracious in his comments to her, despite the fact that she sucks out loud and can't hold a note to save her life. And he mentioned the media circus surrounding the nearly naked pictures of her making the rounds and how well she handled the whole situation. And she barked at him. What kind of idiot takes offense at what he said?? He was being NICE. I'm glad she's gone now. She = idiot and was only there because she had a great look that they were sure they could market. The girl sitting next to her in the final choice episode of Hollywood Week (the one where they take an elevator ride down to a ballroom to hear their fate while perched atop a wobbly wooden chair)? The other girl and Antonella were the last two females up for being chosen and they called them in together (which is cruel both to the person who loses AND to the person who should be allowed to rejoice but can't because it's mean to the loser...ugh). Anyway, when they announced that Antonella was the one going on and she was leaving? She was STUNNED (rightfully so). And after seeing more of Antonella? I am too. The other girl had a great voice. Too bad.
Aaaaaand, that's all there is for Idol comments, kiddies.
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Someone Arrived Here Searching For:
easter bunny, my ass hurts [what the HELL have you been DOING with the EASTER BUNNY!?]
women unable to move there bowels despite great effort
slap the stupid outta
archaic (caveman)
spider man torture
ding fries are run
you tube, jackass [wrong site, fuckface!]
santa poop sayings
farting dominatrix
embarrassing moments when pooping and farting
has shaun cassidy got are wife yes or no [ohhhh the questions this begs. Especially since it was asked by someone in Australia. And is "are" supposed to be "a" and they want to know if he's available? Or was "are" supposed to be "our" and they think he KIDNAPPED their wife? And if "OUR" is correct...is it a group of outter-banks-mormons and one of their sister-wives is missing and they've somehow convinced themselves that Mr. Cassidy kidnapped her?? I could go on and on.... ]
girls shitting bananas [I swear to you, I don't make these up. And I can't believe that THAT is supposed to be the comforting thought here]
female snot humiliation pix [from Egypt]
how to get squeek out of pedal on grand piano [because that's what my site is about. WHY do I show up for these things??]
deaf pron [dude. Learn to SPELL your freakish fetish PROPERLY. Geez.]
wife shit in my mouth [MY advice, and I'm just spitballin' here, would be to CALL A DIVORCE LAWYER]
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